08-19-2012 05:33 PM
This game took me 7 years to get over some of the heart break. I was grieving about this game because it was one of the first communities that opened me up to some things I never knew about people in a good way, but also being confident in myself in ways I didn't know possible, and also learning to laugh if you get good at something, and having fun with it, because before I was never in really positions where I was good at things, and I always got super aggresive when I got good at something, because I was so used to being a "scrub". I always felt like I had to be aggressive and a jerk when I was good at something, because I was used to feeling like a loser.
This game really tore at me and there were a lot of hard times, letting go. I think it isn't until now that I've finally gotten past my hurt of letting go. I spent thousands of hours in high school nights and days playing. In college I did a lot of other stuff, and did all the "normal" fun things, and went to party's and took on new academics and stuff but I never faced my feelings, until I had time. Eventually one summer break I picked up and started playing again, and I wasn't over it, and started getting back into confrontation mode, and socom 4, and the build up and excitement. I sort of matured past the college stuff, and 24 now, but 22 and 23 then. I again put lots of time hours and hours day and night either playing or spending time on this forum learning and reading with the community. I spent a whole year during this time, (super sernior year of college), instead of going to socialize, going back into gaming mode, and enjoying it and loving it. I grew kind of tired of the college stuff senior year, and I found that you truly don't find happiness just doing what other people do. This doesn't mean that it's the right or wrong thing to do. I don't think only doing one thing is healthy.
Tech stuff is a great thing to look into, the tech community is great. There's a lot of great stuff out there. Best thing to do is just relax, and put things into perspective, and mellow out, and face things slowly. The community is still here and people still love socom, and still feel the same way, so there's always something to connect to. Not suggesting to let go.. I was a big advocate of socom 2 HD, and I watned more than anything even recently for it to come out. But also to be comfortable and not an addiction. =)
It was a lot of hurt, but I've also found a way to get back to gaming, and after facing and solving my letting of socom, I've found new community's to enjoy gaming.