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Mar 07 2013
By: Cmdr_Firezone38 Sackboy 583 posts
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(Updated 3/11/13 ) Andromeda Galaxy: Operation Ashes Chapter 1 Baby Brother

[ Edited ]
21 replies 298 views Edited Mar 12, 2013

Hey everyone, 

 

(Updated 3/11/13 at 9:52p.m.) 

 

Ok I finailly have all of Chapter 1 up. I hope you like it and please comment. 

 

(Updated 3/11/13 at 3:55p.m.)

 

Sorry I haven't posted anything for a while I've been real busy. I'll be posting the first Chapter later today :smileyhappy:

 

(Updated) 

 

Ok it's here. The sneak peak I hope you guys have been waiting for. I am trying my best to make this as interesting and attention grabbing as possible. I am not the best writer in the world, but I do love making stories and adventures. If there are any misspelled words or something just doesn't sound right. Let me know. 

 

If you want to know a bit more about the Galaxy, head over to this post right here. (Note: this is an always update post. As I keep adding and making this Galaxy even bigger. Go check it out.) http://community.us.playstation.com/t5/Starhawk-General/Andromeda-Info/m-p/39756339#U39756339

 

The OP is down at the bottom.

 

 

Andromeda Galaxy:

Operation Ashes

Intro

 

            Before you dive into this amazing book I wanted to give you some info you might want to know before beginning this deep and dark story. This story begins on the planet Saben. Saben is relatively similar to Earth with its lay out of the land and the polls. Our main character in this story is John. John is 28 year old man who works for the police department in the city of Canny. He has worked there for ten years and is moving up to the rank of Capt.

           

            This story will take you on loop holes, brain strains, and dig deeper into the mysteries at hand. I hope you enjoy this book as much as I have enjoyed writing it for you. 

 

 

Andromeda Galaxy:

Operation Ashes

Chapter 1

Baby Brother

            In a dark hallway with only the light of exit signs, John walks to the conference room. Still trying to wake up, he grabs the nob and gives it a twist. To his surprise there is no one in the room but a table and lamp. He looks around and then catches a glimpse of a figure.

           

             “Hello?” he says.

 

The figure remains motionless. John begins to sweat and his heart is beating faster.

 

            “You can take a seat now John” the figure says.

 

John grabs for the chair.

 

            “Why was I called here today?” As John sits down he rushing throw his mind thinking of something he might have down to get him here. He looks at the wood table to see two pencils and some paper. That didn’t help him at all. He looked over in the corner and he saw a guard that he didn’t see when he first came in. He begins thinking if he did something wrong. The figure begins to move and John looks up. The figure comes into the light and John recognizes the character as his boss Mick.

 

            “I’m sorry we had to call you in so late and at such short notice, but we felt it was urgent.” Mick is an elder man with a mustache and caterpillar eye brows. He is a gentle man, but can be rough if needed. John was wearing his normal police uniform and his gold watch.

 

            “What is going on Mick? Why am I here?” John asks.

 

            “John, I need you to tell me about you and your brother. How close were you two? How old were your when……when the day he was taken?” Micks face saddens and he begins to cry.

 

            “Mick you know what happened. You were the first one to find out.”

 

        “I know, but I just need you to tell me what you know and remember.” Mick started wiping his eyes so he could get through this meeting.

 

            “Well Jimmy and I were really close to each other. We would play at the park on Saturday afternoon and run through the leaves till we were covered in mud. Hahaha, we used to drive all the girls crazy because we would throw mud balls at them. Jimmy had this bright idea to hide under all the leaves and when the girls would come around we would ambush them with mud. He had an obsession with wood peckers. I don’t know why but he did.” John began laughing really hard that his sides would hurt. But a realization came over him and all those happy memorizes vanished. “I was eight when it all happened. We were walking home from the park and long black van came flying around the corner. Jimmy and I were scared out of our minds. As it was coming down the street it stopped right next to us. The door flue open and these men in black armor like suits came out and grabbed Jimmy. They had mask on, but all I could really see on the mask were these fiery red eyes. They started to come after me, but the cops heard all the nose of me and my brother screaming and drove down the street. I ran, I didn’t know what to do. Jimmy was screaming for me to come back, but I did nothing. All I can remember is the welling of my family and how alone I felt.”

 

     Unable to hold it in, John began to cry without control. Mick came around the desk and rapped John in his arms. “It’s ok John.”

 

            “Mick, this was twenty years ago. Why are you asking me about it again.”

 

    Mick got up and looked at John. Sighing he grabbed a remote and pressed a button. A massive screen descended from the ceiling with a video loading up. The screen flickered a little and the video started. It was a Police recording documentary.

 

      “This was taken this morning” Mick said. John looked closely to the video trying to figure out what this has to do about him. The camera man was walking around some warehouse kind of place. It was dark and there was blood all over the ground. They were following a blood trail. They finally came to a body. I was an officer, but I had never met him before. Attached to the body was a letter which read, “I have your attention” and a video file. Mick pressed another button and the video played. It was pitch black. No light, nothing.

 

            “I was forgotten!!!” said a voice. It was staticy and hard to understand. “I was abandoned and left behind. There was a song I loved when I was a child.” Song plays, “Ring around the rosy, pockets full of possess, ashes ashes we all fall down.” “I am going to fill this world in ashes because my little brother failed to save me. Awww yes little Johnny. It’s me your big brother and I hope your happy.” A machine like face appeared in the video. It was in the shape of a wood pecker with fiery red eyes. “It’s me Jimmy the wood pecker, heehaahaahaa…………………”

 

To be Continued

 

So what did you guys think?

 

OP:

 

So this afternoon I will be posting my sneak peak of Chapter 1.

 

Note: To avoid Copyright Issues I have taken the Starhawk out of the title and I am making my own Universe inspired by Starhawk. I know it's kind of disappointing but I didn't want to do all this work to have it all go down the toilet. 

 

Now you guys can still help and now that even though it is not Starhawk it was greatly inspired and I have been working hard to build this Universe. I've been making histories, Culture, Races, Planets, creatures, and much more. I actually haven't finished the first Chapter. That's why today is a sneak peak. 

 

So keep watching this post this afternoon because I'll be posting it up later. 

 

Hope you guys like it. 

 

Ryan(Cmdr_Firezone38)

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Sackboy
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Re: (Updated) Andromeda Galaxy: Operation Ashes Chapter 1 Sneak Peak (It's here!!!!!!)

Mar 7, 2013

It's here!!!!!!!!!

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Treasure Hunter
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Re: (Updated) Andromeda Galaxy: Operation Ashes Chapter 1 Sneak Peak (It's here!!!!!!)

Mar 7, 2013
Cool story bro!!!


Lol somebody had to say it!
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Uncharted Territory
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Re: (Updated) Andromeda Galaxy: Operation Ashes Chapter 1 Sneak Peak (It's here!!!!!!)

Mar 7, 2013
Sorry in advance.
Nob:
n.
1. Slang The human head.
2. The jack of the same suit as the card turned up by the dealer in cribbage, scoring one point for the holder.

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Emmett kitty is hungry.
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Uncharted Territory
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Re: (Updated) Andromeda Galaxy: Operation Ashes Chapter 1 Sneak Peak (It's here!!!!!!)

Mar 7, 2013
Seriously, this is shaping up to be a good book. Remind you of the star wars books anyone?

Sweet KittySweet KittySweet KittySweet KittySweet KittySweet KittySweet KittySweet KittySweet Kitty

Emmett kitty is hungry.
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Re: (Updated) Andromeda Galaxy: Operation Ashes Chapter 1 Sneak Peak (It's here!!!!!!)

Mar 7, 2013

Thank you. I'm looking very foward to giving you guys more in the future. Come back tomorrow for the whole first Chapter. 

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Fender Bender
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Re: (Updated) Andromeda Galaxy: Operation Ashes Chapter 1 Sneak Peak (It's here!!!!!!)

Mar 8, 2013

**bleep** Mick y u be sad 

 

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Sackboy
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Re: (Updated) Andromeda Galaxy: Operation Ashes Chapter 1 Sneak Peak (It's here!!!!!!)

Mar 8, 2013

highlydangerous9 wrote:

**bleep** Mick y u be sad 

 


You'll find out today. 

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Sackboy
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Re: (Updated) Andromeda Galaxy: Operation Ashes Chapter 1 Sneak Peak (It's here!!!!!!)

Mar 8, 2013

So how many of you read my sneak peak and how many of you actually like this and would want more. Because I don't really want to keep posting if no one's going to read it. 

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Fender Bender
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Re: (Updated) Andromeda Galaxy: Operation Ashes Chapter 1 Sneak Peak (It's here!!!!!!)

Mar 8, 2013

Cmdr_Firezone38 wrote:

So how many of you read my sneak peak and how many of you actually like this and would want more. Because I don't really want to keep posting if no one's going to read it. 


I liked it, I have always loved reading a good story:smileyhappy:

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