Hey guys! Hope you remember me, I posted a thread about my zero budget of The Last of Us short film. I learned through the forums here of its incredible success when it comes to review and I have now released my video to the world to celebrate that haha Anyway, hope you check it out and Naughty Dog, this one's for your awesomeness!
There were a lot of weird cuts in this. The camera went out of focus, and shots were framed inconsistently. Some were framed well, most were not. What I mean by weird cuts is that it "jumped" during the fights to hide the fact these"actors" weren't getting hit at all and that the shots dragged out as well, not ending when they should have ended. Speaking of the actors, they were all pretty wooden.There was no conviction in them, no need to survive in this world. The male lead wasn't convincing at all, infact he was the worst of the bunch. Visual effects like the gun shots and gun splatters were nicely done. Maybe you could have put a bullet hole on the "actors" in post though. Score was okay. Plot was cliche.
Overall, I give it a 4/10.
Thank you so much for your criticism! The biggest problem I have since I have a small audience I don't get constructive criticism enough. I'll make sure to work on my pacing and framing! As for actors, I guess I'll try and bring out more from them but since they're not really in the filmmaking field I'm not sure how much I can squeeze out of them.
I might try experimenting with squibs whenver I get the chance to make another film with guns. Thanks so much!
I understand that the actors aren't totally your fault, especially when you're working with volunteers/friends/ what have you, but you could always ask them to try to express some more, maybe give them a script in ask them to practice when they have time before the shoot. It seemed like this was just what they came up with in maybe a few takes.
Regarding the editing in the fight scenes, you might want to storyboard those out and work out angles where no one can tell that the actors aren't hitting each other. Maybe layoff the shaky cam and go for fast, quick cuts instead, to help break up the action for the actor and not have a distracting jump cuts. Jump cuts can be useful but you have to know when to use them, something that storyboarding can really help determine.
One thing I do, when making films is that I set up a shot by myself, record myself in the shot I was imagining, edit it the way I envisioned and testing it out to see if it works. Then I actually film it and then I have to make sure it works within the greater context of the film I'm working on.
Also, I am happy to see that you didn't respond with hostility. Keep on working on your film making!
Thanks for the advice man! I'll try practice some storyboarding more. Unfortunately as for the fight scenes, that was the time when everybody was tired so we didn't think a lot of those shots through which resulted in those weird jump cuts. We shot that whole film in one day as it was the only time we could use the place. Since it was vacation also, a lot of them were scheduled to fly to different countries. Of course it was my fault too since I couldn't schedule separate filmings (which made us shoot a few takes per scene instead of perfecting them) and at the time I was near to puking because I was flying a heavy flycam the whole day and the constant 37C temperature. (Hottest recorded day in my country at the time).
Anyway, I'm looking forward to my next film since I now know what to work on.